Do you wanna fuck the fish man? Cos I lowkey wanna fuck the fish man. It’s surprising I guess, when I was seeing trailers for The Shape of Water you didn’t see much of the wet dude and I figured they’d make him sexier. Y’all know, help the audience buy into your scaly romance feature by making the romantic hero more human, more a Prince Sidon than some weird primordial beast. But Del Toro calls in his consummate monster man Doug Jones, makes him wear a glorious little rubber suit and puts the character in the most alien and uncomfortable environment to him. A literal fish out of water.
There’s a whole lotta movie in Star Wars: The Last Jedi. It doesn’t all work, it can feel muddled and disparate at times, the wild variety of tones that it tries to capture don’t quite settle into a script that feels far more invested in being funny.
Here’s a piece of short fiction I wrote a while ago now. It was originally posted onto the /r/writingprompts subreddit in response to to the following: ‘A former, now elderly totalitarian dictator meets with the leader of the opposition group that deposed him many years ago.’ There are only two sentences left in here that… Continue reading A short fiction
Y’all done good.
Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul is bad, broken, frustrating and pretty much written off as a lost cause by everyone involved.
Chris Nolan’s Dunkirk is coming out later this year. I hope it’s good. The film websites are already full of the news, Director of Photography Hoyte Van Hoytema, manhandling the IMAX camera to capture war’s viscera. The trailer for it actually was played before my screening. Maybe we’ll someday get a film about its production… Continue reading Their Finest: Its own propaganda
Goddamn old people and their shitty movies. The Time of Their Lives is a wastebag of a film, as poor as the photoshopping on that dreadful poster. Perhaps it’s not their fault they are no longer able to have orginal ideas, that they are so inured to the way things used to be that the furthest… Continue reading The Time of Their Lives: Old and white